In life, we all make certain choices that have a huge impact on our lives……Buy this house or that house? Take this job or the other job? Marry someone or stay single? Etc, etc, etc. Most of us weigh all the pros and cons related to these types of decisions and make the choice that we feel is best for our future, and our lives. Sometimes, down the road, we look back on these choices and feel great about the path it took us down. Other times you may have a reason to feel regret for your decision. Either way, good or bad, it is clear that the decisions of today will stay with you forever.
Then there are other life decisions that are more fluid. Not cut and dry, but gradual. In a lot of cases they are more morally or socially conscious decisions…..Do I support gay marriage? Do I believe in god? Am I a liberal or a conservative? Batman or Iron Man?
Wait. What? Who put that in there? 😉
What I’m trying to say is that sometimes the important choices we make in life are choices of the heart, and they don’t always happen overnight. Sometimes it takes years to develop. However, they have the same ability to change the course of your life forever.
For me, one of those choices has been my outspoken support of LGBT rights. I’m not 100% sure why it has become so important to me though. I’m not gay. I don’t have any gay relatives. I really never even had any close friends that were gay, before I became vocal on the topic. I have lots now. Yet somehow, I have made a choice to make my position known as publicly as I can. This isn’t a decision that I thought about for a little while and then said, “I want to be a booming voice for the gay community!” It was just an evolution of me, as a person, and I feel like it has put me on a path that I didn’t expect. As a result, I find that I am asking myself, WHY? Why do I feel the need to do it, and why am I so personally affected by this decision?
Most guys don’t want, or like, to admit that they are sensitive to the plight of others. Sure, they’ll say they care, and they may very well mean it, but do they cry when they think about the struggles of people they don’t know? I do…..all the time. Admittedly, not in front of other people, but I definitely cry.
Whenever I hear about another teen suicide as a result of being bullied for being gay, or for being in ‘a closet’ that they are too afraid to ‘come out’ of. I can’t even comprehend that kind of pressure. The whole world is heterosexually designed. I don’t mean designed by heterosexuals, I mean designed FOR heterosexuals. Every single person on Earth, gay or straight, man or woman, is born to desire other people. Your feelings for one sex outweigh your feelings for the other sex. These feelings begin at a very young age, even though you may not be able to put those feelings to work until you get a little older. However, before you even begin to truly understand why you are ‘drawn’ to a certain sex, you are completely overloaded with information that tells you that person is supposed to be the opposite sex. How incredibly confusing has that got to be for a gay kid? Nobody who is straight could possibly relate…….EVER! When I take the time to imagine it, it makes me sad beyond words. Nobody should have to go through that. Most certainly not a child.
I also get angry, too. A lot. Maybe, because at the root of my support, is the utter contempt I have for anyone who hates, belittles or in any way tries to oppress any one else because they are different. It pisses me off something fierce. I know we all want a kumbaya world where we turn the other cheek when faced with ignorance, but sometimes I wonder if knocking out a few assholes here and there wouldn’t be more effective. What if every time a report came out that two bigoted jackwads nearly beat a gay guy to death, we get to round up 3 of their like minded friends, throw them in a hole about 15′ deep, and bury them in glitter, until they suffocate? You know, the whole, “You put one of ours in the hospital, we put one of yours in the morgue” thing. A little unrealistic, I know, but you get my frustration. I know that hate is at the root of all evil, but if you hate the haters, doesn’t it cancel itself out, and then it’s ok? I don’t know, but that’s the theory I wish to endorse. However, all I’m thinking about right now is whether the glitter reference was too cliche? Probably, but guess what? I can make that joke and not get criticized because stereotypical jokes are funny when you know the person is not being malicious. Nobody who knows me would ever accuse of that. Well, maybe one guy, but he’s just an asshole.
Ultimately, there really is no clear cut reason that I have chosen this path, but it is one that I walk proudly. It is also one that I will likely walk down more loudly in the future. I appreciate the positive feedback that I get from the others out there who care just as much but are more geared to walk the quieter path. As long as your on it, you’re all good with me, and if you’re not, beware.